Cape cod is my new destination.  I’m trying to imagine the beach, the figures in the early morning leaning against buildings in town as I make my way to get morning coffee.  How will I know which cafe will stay option all year?  Which will welcome my laptop, my need for quiet and company?  The winter light, the early morning misty pink sunrises and the dark heavy red sunsets, the golden hour of late afternoon which has the painterly light sought by so many.  The dunes, the beach rugosa, the winding paths through the salt flats.  I last lived there in 87.  Nearly a quarter century ago.  I’m no longer that skinny bewildered girl hidden by a mass of hair.

I’ll get a puppy.  I might get a kitten.  I will leave behind all my furniture, take my books and clothes and pots and pans and start again.  At fifty, I’ll start again, near the water at first light.

Yesterday I had a perfect day.  It is May, and clouds are gathering now to tease with rain that most likely won’t fall.  Yet I did water the garden…

In my quiet nook of the woods, waking refreshed after a few days struggle with flu, I had my first day of no-work at my disposal.  The best part was that I did not realize this until mid-day.  No need to correct anything, grade anything, get there on time for anything.  No need to plan out next year’s syllabus, again and again and again.

I planted four small dianthus, two petunias, and the beautiful white trailing flower whose name I’ve forgotten.  I knocked small holes out of the bottom of two old clay amphoras to create planters for more petunias.  The breeze has been delightful, softening the 80 degree weather.  Oh, that is a nice typeset back there, the way the zero is slightly smaller than the eight.

I thought to finally unleash the patio umbrella which weathered the winter, but did not get far.  Several angry bees came storming out, so I abandoned that project. Are they actually nesting there?  No matter.  I retreated back in, took a long walk later, debated over a this or that problem.

Decided nothing.

This morning I made the decision.

A perfect day.

pink poppy by dan/freedigitalphotos.net